Hallo Wean Us From Our Childhoods

Here we are!! The weekend before Halloween; let the parties begin. Annnnnd here we go-

 A). I hate these underwear costumes that  make me want to rip off my own flesh and probably jump off a first floor balcony. Why is this the gold standard of Halloween now. 

Hi! Yep… I’m dressed as a hooker. We live just down the street. This is my daughter, she’s four. I know, so hard being a good role model for our girls these days.

B). I’ll be someone I admire. Who do I. admire. Who… do I…. admire….

C). Ok I need to just pick something. This one will make me so hot and sweaty and angry all night, not happening. This one would fit, but I really didn’t want to dress up as a giant tooth. Giant hot dog, no. Giant banana, no. 

D). Wouldn’t be able to sit down.
E). Wouldn’t be able to stand up. 
F). This part I would have to use safety pins for because, safety. 

G). Who are they kidding with these tights? Where is Wonder Woman already, I need to kick her- 

H). Wait am I in the underwear section again?

I). Oh no, my bad. My bad. I’m in the youth girls section. 

J). Alright I’m done. 

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